Lumberton, NC

Kevin:  (describing the town) ...and the Comfort Inn is right there next to the Outback Steakhouse.
Kenny:  Yea, u could find a escort or hooker around there too...might make your dick fall off though.
Me:  I only have one and I'd like to keep it.
Kenny:  Well I'm sure you could get a strap-on somewhere in town.

Cafe Risque

There several billboards for this place along I-95 making it seem like a big deal.  It's right by the farm I was working at, so I decided to let the world know it's a huge let down.  I was thinking about researching the inside for Chauncey, especially since they have "Good Food" AND "Adult Toys"

Waffle burglar

This was just a funny headline; something I would do.